Downton Abbey review: Series 3 Episode 3

© ITV; Image credit ITV

“No, I’m a useful spinster, good at helping out, that is my role. And spinsters get up for breakfast.”

I think I might like Spinster Edith, if she really commits to her role. And by ‘commits to her role’, I of course mean ‘turns into a bitter raving drunk’.

Poor Lady Edith, nothing ever goes right for her, does it? Sure, sometimes she brings it on herself, like that time she wrote to the Turkish embassy and told them that Mr Pamuk (RIP) died in Mary’s bed, thus starting a scandal that nearly resulted in the total destruction of her sister’s reputation and marriage prospects, thus making Mary kind of hate her for a while. But she actually developed into quite an interesting character last series, being the one who gave the most attention to all the soldiers living in the house. Thinking back to the start of this episode, where she was so happy to finally be the centre of attention and about to start a life away from Downton, is heartbreaking when you know what’s coming. But of course she was never going to actually marry Sir Anthony; it didn’t make sense in terms of the plot – having her living nearby, as the wife of a well-to-do older man with only one arm, doesn’t leave much potential in the way of drama. Having her be jilted at the altar by said older man? Sure, it doesn’t really make any sense (seriously, they described Sir Anthony as “any port in a storm” for Edith pre-war; her prospects are hardly any better now) but it does leave lots of room for drama. Laura Carmichael was pretty great the whole way through this episode, so hopefully being a bitter spinster will give her a chance to develop further. Until, of course, they marry her off to some handsome young thing with a passion for cars and... whatever else it is Edith likes.

And in other totally shocking, not at all predictable news, Matthew has agreed to use Reggie Swire’s money to save Downton Abbey and will run the estate along with Robert! I did not see that coming at all! I really honestly thought they were going to move to that other house and they would get rid of most of the servants and Violet would run a shop and the programme would be renamed Downton Place. Luckily, I love Downton Abbey and its ridiculous plot contrivances more than is probably healthy, so the blatant “this part of the plot has run its course, we need to get out of it” feel of Reggie’s actually letter really tickled me. It helped that Matthew joked about Mary having written it, so at least they sort of acknowledged just how ludicrously convenient the whole thing was. Seriously, the letter was so suspiciously close to what Matthew had wanted to hear that I actually just laughed out loud. Still, the fact that it was sweet Daisy, the lowest of the servants in the Abbey, who was ultimately its saviour was a sweet touch. I’ll let you away with it this time, Fellowes. This time.

© ITV; Image credit ITV

Down below decks, the war between Thomas and O’Brien is escalating nicely; this time it was Molesley who got caught up in their schemes, as Thomas used him to spread a rumour amongst the Crawleys that O’Brien was planning to leave. Poor Molesley, finally gets up to the Big House, and nearly finds himself on the wrong side of the indomitable O’Brien; as Daisy so eloquently put it (must be that dictionary she swallowed) “I wouldn’t be in her bad books for a gold clock.” O’Brien vowing revenge on Thomas is a promise of drama that I honestly can’t quite wait to see; I’m almost giddy with anticipation. Watch out for any stray bars of soap, Mr Barrow, she can be quite lethal with them.

Away from Downton, two former servants popped up for their now weekly random little vignettes: in prison, one of Bates’ fellow prisoners is trying to get him in trouble by placing contraband in his cell (seriously, mate, don’t bother, Thomas and O’Brien already tried that one and it didn’t work), while Anna’s discussion with Vera’s neighbour doesn’t help his case in the slightest; while Ethel once again started to ask Isobel for help, then backed away at the last minute. Thrilling stuff all round.

But one little bright spot below stairs (well, eventually) was Mrs Hughes and her potential cancer diagnosis. Teaming her up with Mrs Patmore and Carson for this was a masterstroke; Jim Carter’s performance as Carson tries to show without letting on how much he knows is just a thing of beauty, and Lesley Nichol is starting to steal most scenes she is in as Mrs Patmore. But one of the lines of the night was Mrs Hughes’ sceptical “Oh will you now?” response to Carson’s plans to help her if she got tired; Phyllis Logan’s portrayal of a proud, strong woman suddenly feeling vulnerable and scared but trying to hide it was really quite wonderful to watch. And the scene in which Cora told her that, if she really was ill, she didn’t need to worry about where she would stay or who would look after her, because the answer was Downton Abbey and they would, was actually quite lovely. As Mrs Hughes herself said, “But this time, I freely admit it. I was quite touched.” In fact, I was practically singing along in glee with Carson at the end of the episode.